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Archive for Untimed – Page 2

From Sketch to Final

May15

Dave Phillips, the awesome artist I commissioned to illustrate my time travel novel, Untimed, has been quietly cranking away. A couple of weeks ago he finished the rough versions of all twenty-one images. I thought I’d use this post as an opportunity not only to show off his brilliant work, but to shed some light on the process. The images on the left are the roughs, and on the right the finals.

End Game: Tick-Tock TLCEnd Game: Tick-Tock TLC

We use the roughs to establish composition and for me to check that all the details are consistent with the novel. I give him feedback and he then spends the time to polish the image up. Neither of these images required any major changes, but it’s fun to see both how well the rough makes an impression, and how much more detailed the final is.

To get a close up look at this, click one of the images and it will bring up a Smugmug lightbox. You can then use the arrow keys to flip back and forth between the images, including between the rough and the final to see the differences.

This particular image, released previously, shows the mysterious Tick-Tock gloating over a dying Ben Franklin — oops!

Looped: Meeting Mr. and Mrs. FakeLooped: Meeting Mr. and Mrs. Fake

And this new one occurs 80 years later across the English channel. Ever wonder if you’d like yourself? Time travelers can find out first hand. Or, perhaps, meeting yourself will destroy the very fabric of the spacetime continuum!

Find out more about Untimed here.

Related posts:

  1. Untimed – Out on Submission!
  2. Untimed – Meet the Tocks
  3. The Final Cover
  4. Untimed – Two Novels, Two Drafts!
By: agavin
Comments (8)
Posted in: Untimed
Tagged as: Andy Gavin, Arts and Entertainment, Ben Franklin, Dave Phillips, Design, Fiction, Illustration, SmugMug, Tick-Tock, Time travel, Untimed

The Rules of Magic

Apr26

I ran  across this extremely interesting and totally meta article on fantasy magic by Brandon Sanderson. I’ve had my own version of this kind of theory since the early 80s but he really spells it out.

He breaks magic systems down into how “hard” or “soft” they are. Meaning, how defined are their rules.

If you’re a writer working on your fantasy magic systems, I suggest that you decide what kind of feel you want for your magic. Do you like the techno-magic like you find in my books, or in books by L.E. Modesitt Jr. and Melanie Rawn? Do you like the hybrids like you find in someone more like David Eddings or J.K. Rowling? Or, do you prefer your magic to be more vague and mysterious, like you see in Tolkien or the George R. R. Martin books? I like to read works by all of these authors, but when I write, I prefer to have rules, costs, and laws to work with in my magic, and that makes it more fun for me.

By hard or techno-magic he means books like his own, or comic books, or video games (like WOW or Diablo), where the magic is a well defined tool. On the soft side are books like Tolkien with a more mythic feel. But what is particularly interesting is his insights into the narrative impact of magic.

Resist the urge to use magic to solve problems unless you’ve already explained and shown that aspect of how the magic works. Don’t give the heroes a new power whenever they need one, and be very careful about writing laws into your system just so that you can use them in a single particular situation. (This can make your magic seem flimsy and convenient, even if you HAVE outlined its abilities earlier.)

Very good advice. If your magic is soft enough that major new developments occur every time it is used, then you better NOT use it to solve problems. Or:

If you’re writing a soft magic system, ask yourself “How can they solve this without magic?” or even better, “How can using the magic to TRY to solve the problem here really just make things worse.” (An example of this: The fellowship relies on Gandalf to save them from the Balrog. Result: Gandalf is gone for the rest of that book.)

Semi-consciously, this is what I did in The Darkening Dream which has multiple complex magic systems that are not fully explained, and is hence a kind of middle-soft magic universe. The characters do use magic, but it rarely helps or pans out the way they want, and when it does, I’m generally using a power that I clearly set up before. The villains make heavier use of magic, and their systems are better defined. Still, things often go poorly. In this book I really wanted to give the magic a sense of weight. To make it clear that it was never free or easy and required years of study, practice, and consequences often far outweighing the long term benefits.

My second novel, Untimed, is in many ways closer to a hard magic system in that the time travel has very rigid rules. This (and the related villains) are the only “supernatural” element. I try to maintain my sense of mystery in a number of ways despite this increased definition. 1) The characters are young and alone and don’t know all the rules. 2) They find them out as they go and by trial and error (emphasis on the error). This is also useful to avoid bombarding the reader with too much infodump. 3) I keep the “how” this all came to be and the “why” the villains do what they do hidden throughout the first book.

To me, this balance of the feel of the mystical world is absolutely essential to fantasy writing. How much I like a story is heavily influenced by it, even if I am a fan of tales across the hard/soft spectrum. Like everything, execution is key.

Find Brandon Sanderson’s entire article here.

A detailed write up on the basis of the magic I used for The Darkening Dream is here.

Related posts:

  1. The Magic of The Darkening Dream
By: agavin
Comments (7)
Posted in: Fiction, Writing
Tagged as: Balrog, Brandon Sanderson, David Eddings, Fantasy, Gandalf, George R. R. Martin, J. R. R. Tolkien, J.K. Rowling, Melanie Rawn, The Darkening Dream, Untimed

Untimed – Out on Submission!

Apr13

Young Ben Franklin at the printing press

Exciting times! My brand spanking new literary agent is already out there earning his keep. Eddie (the aforementioned agent of awesome) sent out  Untimed Thursday on submission to New York and worldwide. It’s not only great to have such enthusiasm — we only signed two weeks ago — but an appropriate juncture given that the historical changes in Untimed (a time travel novel) pivot around Ben Franklin, who was one of America’s earliest important printers. People tend to remember him for the whole “founding father” bit but he was first and foremost a printer, political essayist, and satirist (not to be confused with my favorite mythological beings, satyrs).

But rest assured, Untimed is anything but old fashioned. Below and left is another awesome illustration by Dave Phillips to underscore the prose (one of approximately 21 that will be in the book). And that’s just a rough draft! Dave, like many artists, does two passes. The first (like this one) is to establish the composition, mood, and layout. Then, once we get that out of the way, he does a final with more detail. Truth is, this is little different than writing. The initial illustration is like a scene outline. Or video games, where we would rough out a level without all the visual details to see if the game play worked as intended.

The mysterious Tick-Tock gloats over a dying Ben Franklin - in 1725! — rough draft illustration by Dave Phillips

Who are the Tick-Tocks? And what do they want?

Nothing good, as far as protagonist Charlie is concerned. Their policy on time travelers is to stab, shoot, or crush first — ask questions later.

But it’s more complicated than that, as I’m working out now while making detailed outlines for book 2 and 3. Ah, plotting. I have a love/hate relationship with this phase of novel writing. Scratch that, more hate. I love the actual writing best.

This time around I’m trying to plot the entire book in detail before digging into the text, which being a pantser is against my nature. But it needs doing as time travel is complicated and I must research the periods I intend to visit. I’ve already pounded through four or five history books in the last two weeks. Hint: Buckle on your sandals, this time I’m headed way back!

Related posts:

  1. Untimed – Meet the Tocks
  2. Untimed – The Second Cover
  3. Untimed – Two Novels, Two Drafts!
  4. Untimed – Two Novels, Check!
  5. Untimed – The Last Draft?
By: agavin
Comments (8)
Posted in: Untimed
Tagged as: Andy Gavin, Business, Dave Phillips, Eddie, EDDIE SCHNEIDER, Jabberwocky, Literary agent, New York, Publishing, Publishing and Printing, Tick-Tock, Time travel, Untimed

The Call – Down the Rabbit Hole

Mar29

On Tuesday I got the call. (Technically, I’d gotten the call a couple of times before, but this time it was from someone that fit)

Backing up. Two months ago I sent a small blast of query letters regarding Untimed to a few top literary agents. Unlike a couple years ago when I did this for The Darkening Dream, I only sent them to people I was really interested in, and I didn’t engage emotionally (a few rounds of arbitrary rejection will inure you to that peril).

Untimed is more high concept than TDD, so my full request rate was a stellar 20%!

Eddie Schneider of JABberwocky sent this short email two weeks in:

Please send over the manuscript — this is definitely something I’m interested in!

Short – but sweet. So I sent the manuscript (about 30 seconds later). A month after that I got a note that he was reading and “so far, so good.” Then I flew off to the Maldives (in the Indian Ocean) for my friend and business partner Jason Rubin’s wedding (totally awesome BTW, pic here). In the back of my head there was that usual hope/worry thing, that voice that alternately mumbles “it’s a great book” and “probably, just another rejection.” Remember, of course, that publishing and literature are hugely subjective and even Harry Potter and A Wrinkle in Time were rejected countless times.

But on Monday, when I saw an email from him in my mailbox I somehow knew it was positive (of course I “knew” this on several previous occasions too…). But this time I was right.

In any case, I had a great (and long) phone chat with Eddie and we hit it off. And I like the intuitive feel of Jabberwocky. First of all their website is awfulagent.com – obviously they have a bit of a sense of humor – and second they represent a large stable of “real” science fiction and fantasy authors. Authors I’ve read like Charlaine Harris, Brandon Sanderson (my Way of Kings review here), Elizabeth Moon (I read her gritty military fantasy series way way back and loved it), and more recently Mark Hodder (my Spring-Heeled Jack review here). Eddie likes video games and graphic novels and got excited when I started talking about Julian the Apostate (more on that here). No one gets excited about Julian the Apostate.

And did I mention that he thinks Untimed is great as is (i.e. no big fifth draft – which I would do if I thought it’d make the book better, but I’m certainly happy to skip after four drafts and the line edit to end all line edits).

So we haggled out the paperwork. I’m represented. Now off down the rabbit hole to see what the publishers have to say. Will they be willing to offer Untimed the treatment it deserves? Time shall tell. We hope so.

Nice to have a another we in the equation!

Jabberwocky by Lewis Carroll

‘Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe;
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.

“Beware the Jabberwock, my son!
The jaws that bite, the claws that catch!
Beware the Jubjub bird, and shun
The frumious Bandersnatch!”

He took his vorpal sword in hand:
Long time the manxome foe he sought–
So rested he by the Tumtum tree,
And stood awhile in thought.

And as in uffish thought he stood,
The Jabberwock, with eyes of flame,
Came whiffling through the tulgey wood,
And burbled as it came!

One, two! One, two! and through and through
The vorpal blade went snicker-snack!
He left it dead, and with its head
He went galumphing back.

“And hast thou slain the Jabberwock?
Come to my arms, my beamish boy!
O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!”
He chortled in his joy.

‘Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe;
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.

Related posts:

  1. Call For Feedback
  2. Book Review: Rabbit Run
  3. Untimed – The Second Cover
  4. First Pro Review
  5. Video Game Page & Book Status
By: agavin
Comments (6)
Posted in: Untimed
Tagged as: Andy Gavin, Brandon Sanderson, Charlaine Harris, EDDIE SCHNEIDER, Elizabeth Moon, Jabberwocky, Jason Rubin, JOSHUA BILMES, Julian the Apostate, Lewis Carroll, Literary agent, Maldives, Mark Hodder, Spring-Heeled Jack, The Darkening Dream, Untimed

Untimed – Meet the Tocks

Mar13

I finished the line editing on my second novel, Untimed, last December, but that doesn’t mean the work is really over. On one front, it’s out to various agents and editors, but on the other I’m working on spit and polish.

I had it professionally proofread and just finished going over all those little fixes. This is just an extra step to make sure it’s as free of errors as possible and that the comma, hyphen, and spelling niceties are as consistent as possible. And apparently I don’t like commas half as well as I should.

But far more exciting is that I’m having the book illustrated! I know it’s relatively rare to illustrate novels, but I love art and believe — well done — that it really adds to the overall experience. Working with the agent who represented the awesome cover artist for The Darkening Dream, I found a talented illustrator named Dave Phillips (his website is here and some portfolio samples here). He has a real knack for character (see this for example) and knows how to capture lifelike personality in his figures. Over the last few weeks we’ve been developing character designs and now the first (more or less) finished image.

To the right, our hero Charlie (in front), confronts the mysterious Tick-Tock, a rapier-wielding clockwork man who serves as the only link to Charlie’s missing father.

But Tick-Tocks are full of surprises, including the ability to punch holes in time!

Two free Naughty Dark tickets to the first reader who guesses the exact physical location of the scene (reply in comments here). You must not be one of my beta readers or one of their relatives. Hint: “Ghost H…”

Related posts:

  1. Untimed – Two Novels, Check!
  2. Untimed – The Second Cover
  3. Untimed – Two Novels, Two Drafts!
  4. Untimed Fourth Draft Finished
  5. Untimed – Off for Line Editing
By: agavin
Comments (4)
Posted in: Untimed
Tagged as: Andy Gavin, Arts, books, Cover art, Dave Phillips, Fiction, Illustration, Tick-Tock, Tick-Tocks, Time travel, Untimed, Writing and Editing

Untimed Fourth Draft Finished

Dec12

After nine days of solid crunch I’ve finished the fourth (and hopefully final) draft of my second novel, Untimed (read more about it here). This involved reading the book three whole times in one week. Ug! But the book is essentially done done! I have just a few little tweaks remaining and some work to do on promotional/pitch materials and I’ll need to figure out how to sell it. This book really kicks ass. It clocks in at 75,000 words (just 300 pages) but a tremendous amount happens. Plus the voice is great and (I hope) hooks from the first line.

Now I really have to start gearing back into the production on my first novel, The Darkening Dream, and get that out the door. And start thinking about a new book for January. Woah!

To find out more about my writing, click here.

Related posts:

  1. Untimed – The Last Draft?
  2. On Writing: Yet Another Draft
  3. Untimed – Two Novels, Check!
  4. Untimed – Two Novels, Two Drafts!
  5. Weekend Draft
By: agavin
Comments (1)
Posted in: Untimed
Tagged as: Andy Gavin, drafts, Fiction, Line Editing, Novel, Untimed, Writing

Diablo 3 Opening Cinematic

Dec11

Today is a double nerdgasm day. Not only did Naughty Dog announce it’s new game, The Last of Us. But–

the Diablo 3 opening cinematic was released. The game itself should be coming in Q1 2012. Ah, so many games, so little time. I haven’t even had the moment(s) to pop in Skyrim. Been too busy packaging The Darkening Dream and editing Untimed.

Related posts:

  1. Video Game Page & Book Status
  2. The edits are all in!
  3. Naughty Dog – A Pedigree Breed
  4. Juggling Brains
  5. Untimed – Two Novels, Check!
By: agavin
Comments (1)
Posted in: Games
Tagged as: Blizzard Entertainment, Darkening Dream, Diablo 3, Diablo III, Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim, Games, Naughty Dog, Untimed, Video game

First Pro Review

Dec10

The Darkening Dream just received it’s first pro review, from Kirkus Reviews.

Read it here on the new review page. Highlights include:

 “A vampire novel with actual bite” and “wonderfully twisted sense of humor”

In other writing news, I’m through all the heavy lifting with regard to the Untimed line edits and hope to be done in a day or two! Woot! The book has shrunk 6,000+ words down to 75,000 without loosing any scenes.

Related posts:

  1. Video Game Page & Book Status
  2. The edits are all in!
  3. Villetta Update
  4. Revision Slog – Novel as Algorithm
  5. Website Upgrades Coming
By: agavin
Comments (2)
Posted in: Darkening Dream
Tagged as: Andy Gavin, Indie Reviews, Kirkus review, Kirkus Reviews, The Darkening Dream, Untimed, Vampire, vampires

Video Game Page & Book Status

Dec04

I deployed a new video game topic page yesterday. This was a good chunk of work. I use a modified iThemes Builder child theme and so continued to use their custom layout and variable widget systems to build out a special page to replace the older, uglier, video games page. First though, I had to hack into the code and modify the way in which the sharing icons and related posts were being inserted. WordPress plugins often have automatic insertion into the end of the content, but as soon as you start getting a more sophisticated layout with more than one “content” on the same page that starts to be problematic. I had to turn it off and insert it manually into the right templates.

Then I spent an entire day exploring ways to implement different grids of magazine style excerpts for particular types of posts on particular pages. I ended up writing the code myself, but using Builder’s extension system to inject into the layout’s I wanted. I got it working for this page, but I’m only about 90% satisfied. There are still some mysteries. Like how to convince CSS to extend each entry down to the height of the tallest one on a line. I align them with “vertical-align: top”, but I don’t know how to match up the bottoms. I’d also like to improve the handling of the thumbnail photos and I need to figure out how to generalize my extension so I can use it on different pages. That being said, I still think it’s better looking than the old page.

Check out the new page here and let me know what you think.

With regard to my books, busy busy. I’m waiting on a second sketch for my new, professional cover for The Darkening Dream. That should come any day. I’ve pretty much finished up the interior artwork, but I’m not ready to post it just yet — soon. I’ve been working through proofs of the interior book design as well, which is looking great.

I also got back the full line edit of Untimed yesterday. Two of my editors, Renni Browne and Shannon Roberts did a simultaneous full line edit. This is on top of four drafts of higher level discussions. Getting 320 pages of line edit back is a lot to digest in one sitting! Look at the example page to the right. That’s just one page worth of edits. I have to go over them all and decide what to keep, what not, and how to rework anything suggested by the comments. But it’s worth it. Books need editing. It’s essential to have more than one set of eyes on them. And, ultimately, it’s still my book — I decide what stays and what goes.

This will keep me busy for a week or two. Haha.

More about my writing here.

Related posts:

  1. So you want to be a video game programmer? – part 5 – The Method
  2. So you want to be a video game programmer? – part 3 – Getting Started
  3. So you want to be a video game programmer? – part 1 – Why
  4. So you want to be a video game programmer? – part 2 – Specs
  5. New Book Pages
By: agavin
Comments (2)
Posted in: Darkening Dream, Technology, Untimed
Tagged as: Andy Gavin, blog, CSS, Editing, game, Line Editing, The Darkening Dream, Untimed, Video game, Website, WordPress

New Book Pages

Nov16

Continuing the big upgrades on my website, I’ve built out new pages for my books: The Darkening Dream and Untimed. And I’m in the process of working on a generic “Andy Gavin: Author” landing page too which I should have done in a couple hours. These pages are an attempt to look less bloggy, more like typical author and book sites. I’ll, of course, be continuing to refine and add. One of the nice things about using WordPress is that it’s easy to continually modify. I’ll add reviews and promotional information. Sample chapters, etc. When I get my professional cover art for The Darkening Dream I’ll have to reskin those pages.

Please let me know (via comments) what you think about the new pages. Or any suggestions you might have. Comments are turned off on the book pages themselves, but you can use this one here.

At a technical level, these new templates show off some of the power of the builder platform premium theme I’m using. It has cool layout tools that make it easier to create different layouts in WordPress and then assign them to different pages. Each of these layouts can reference or use separately constructed menus and widgets as well. That way, for example, I have a different more bookish menu on those pages, but it’s shared by a number of layouts. I’ve also been using a quick redirects plugin to create virtual slugs that I can use to build out URL hooks that are independent of the pages themselves. And one of yesterday’s projects was getting that animated jQuery “featured post” slider going. Builder had one that formed the core, but like many WordPress plugins it was setup for a single instance with just one category. I hacked the code to add parameters to the shortcode enabling me to feature different feeds on different pages. Took all of 15 minutes (mad coding skills — and I don’t even really know PHP). One wonders why the authors didn’t build it that way to begin with. I’ve noticed that PHP code is often extremely “non-functional” with an over reliance on global variables. I don’t mean the program doesn’t work, but that it doesn’t adhere to proper functional programming style to allow easy and modular reuse of code.

Check out The Darkening Dream book page.

Check out the Untimed book page.

Related posts:

  1. Website Upgrades Coming
  2. Book Review: The First American
  3. Untimed – Two Novels, Check!
By: agavin
Comments (1)
Posted in: Technology, Writing
Tagged as: Andy Gavin, Author Website, Blogging, Darkening Dream, PHP, Programming, Tools, Uniform Resource Locator, Untimed, Website, WordPress, WordPress Plugin Directory

Website Upgrades Coming

Nov06

Since I’m waiting for both my line edits on Untimed and my proofreading on The Darkening Dream, I’m researching website construction. I have to morph, upgrade, or supplement this blog with a genuine author website and I can’t bring myself to hire someone to do it given that I’ve written far bigger and more complex websites and apps. It’ll just annoy me to no end to not be able to control it all myself. But at the same time, old school coding the whole thing manually (I’d probably use Ruby on Rails for that) is overkill and probably too much work.

So I read this Professional WordPress book yesterday and today to see if it would be reasonable to just extend WordPress. I think it is. A few plugins and some custom theme programming will probably do the trick. The problem is that I host on wordpress.com and they don’t allow you to install extra plugins (they have some installed by default) or add any PHP code. So I’ll have to migrate to a self hosted server. Maybe Media Temple VPS? Rackspace? Research. Research. Research. Anyone have any suggestions/experience with the good hosting platforms?

And I have to teach myself PHP, so I grabbed the bird book. PHP is one of those popular but slightly icky languages like PERL and JAVA that I’ve never been very partial to. It’s like Ruby, but 100x uglier and more primitive. I am a LISP (and Ruby) guy after all. Oh well. This is easy peasy programming, so I’ll just suck it up. Using something like WordPress will make my life much easier maintaining the site as it’s choke full of content management features. If I program it myself I have to go and code everything manually, which really isn’t very efficient.

I even wonder if one of these newer WordPress themes/frameworks like PageLines Platform isn’t a good idea. Anyone use one?

More to come as I get into it.

Related posts:

  1. The hits keep on coming
By: agavin
Comments (7)
Posted in: Technology
Tagged as: Andy Gavin, Author Website, blog, Darkening Dream, Languages, PageLines Platform, PHP, Plug-in (computing), Programming, Rails, Ruby, Ruby on Rails, Untimed, Website, WordPress, wordpress.com

Untimed – The Last Draft?

Oct23

I got notes back from my editors concerning my new novel, Untimed. This is the least stressful batch I’ve ever received. Not only are there relatively few changes, but I agree with all the big ones. Granted, this was the third draft they gave notes on, so we changed a lot of things earlier, but it’s good to see the light at the end of the tunnel. It’s been 48 hours and I’m already through the first 25% and I’ll be done by mid-week for sure, then it’s time for another full read and polish (by me) and the line edit (by them and by me).

Suggestions for big changes, particularly big cuts, are a bit like losing a loved one. You have to progress through the stages of grief:

Denial – I won’t really have to do it. Those notes are for someone else’s book.

Anger – They don’t really understand what I was intending!

Bargaining – Maybe if I only do this or that, they’ll “let me” keep most of it. NOTE: Really the author has the power, but when an editor is good, they’re usually right.

Depression – This is going to be so much work! And I loved that stuff!

Acceptance – In the end, it’ll be a better book.

This particular batch of notes only puts a couple tiny babies on the butcher’s block. Not even whole sections of the plot, just a few little scenes or ideas. Not too bad.

Back to work.

For my posts on writing, click here.

Related posts:

  1. On Writing: Yet Another Draft
  2. Weekend Draft
  3. Untimed – Two Novels, Check!
  4. Untimed – The Second Cover
  5. Untimed – Two Novels, Two Drafts!
By: agavin
Comments (1)
Posted in: Untimed
Tagged as: Andy Gavin, Untimed

Dreaming Along

Oct13

I’m plugging away on my “after the gap” read of The Darkening Dream. At the 60% point, so I should hopefully be done by the end of the week. There’s only one scene I need to go back to and give a bit of a rewrite. It’s one that’s always been a bit problematic, where a character tells a bit of a story about a previous encounter with the undead, and while it’s only 800 words (it used to be 3,000 in the first draft) it’s told in dialog. That’s always awkward, and it’s the only place in the book where a happening longer than a couple sentences is dialoged out. I even have to use that long dialog paragraph leave off the terminal curly brace thing. Over the two years since I first wrote the scene, I’ve rewritten it perhaps five different ways. As dialog, as flashback, with sarcastic interrupts, without. It was once a creepy, but over long episode, but now after so much trimming it just lacks punch.

I’ll have to revisit after I get to the end of this pass.

And I finally adjusted to past tense again (only took 20,000 words!). It’ll be interesting to see if my head whiplashes so badly when I flip back to Untimed (hopefully soon). I’m due my third draft notes any day now.

Moving through The Darkening Dream I find it paced like a roller coaster. Literally. Including the slow initial tick tick ascent to the top of the first hill (which crests at about at the 20% mark). The pacing is mirrored by the chapter length and the progression of time. In the first quarter, several weeks pass for the characters and on average the chapters are longer and more linear. Then at the top of the hill, I start to slide in the point of view of first one and the other villain. With that, the chapter length halves and the action is compressed into a small number of hectic and deadly days. Like most stories with a lot of violence, if one actually had to endure the narrative in real life, one would probably drop dead of exhaustion. TVs 24 being the ultimate example.

On a slightly different note, I switched the name on my ghetto cover (my home-brew one on the right, placeholder until I commission a real one) back to “Andy” as opposed to “Andrew.” I keep debating this. At some level it feels slightly odd to be in my 40s, a husband, and a father and not have dropped my nickname. But I just never have, and on the plus side all my SEO points at Andy, not Andrew. The later is what the Gas Company calls me.

For more posts on writing, click here.

Related posts:

  1. Done Again, Hopefully
By: agavin
Comments (2)
Posted in: Darkening Dream
Tagged as: Andy Gavin, Darkening Dream, Fiction, The Darkening Dream, Untimed, Writing

Vocal Whiplash

Oct11

I started a new read through and edit on my first novel, The Darkening Dream yesterday. I’m waiting for feedback on my newer book and wanted to cleanup the first one so I’ll have it ready to be proofread for possible self-publishing. This is the first time I’ve looked at it in eight months (I’ve been working on Untimed) and the difference in voice is flogging my brain.

It’s weird and not a little disturbing to read your “older” work. I started TDD in January 2008, writing the first draft of what’s now the opening twenty percent (before heavy alterations). I stopped (because of work and the birth of my son) and picked up in fall of 2009. Although I’ve done about a zillion (more like ten) drafts, traces of this oldest style remain in these early sections. And boy has my literary voice changed since then. Most dramatically, I no longer detail out as much of the action and setting. Nowadays, I concentrate on sketching and implying important points, choosing my scenes less to block through the whole action than to paint in important moments. These old sections have been heavily trimmed down, edited and reworked, but they are still organized in a stodgier more sequential fashion.

And the beginning of my story is tricky, introducing a period world with a large cast of period characters. I’ve several times restructured the start of TDD, including one late attempt this year to write a number of alternate starts. But I have never found a way to replace the measured build up I currently have with a more hook driven start like Untimed has. It’s easier to start that way. Oh well, live and learn.

The biggest shocker, however, is how difficult it is getting used to past tense again. TDD is written in the normal third person past limited, where different chapters focus on different characters. There is no omniscient narrator but the implied narrator shifts from chapter to chapter. Untimed is first person present. Single narrator obviously. I’ve really grown to love the immediate quality of the present tense. One also gets to ditch most the “hads” used to indicate the past perfect. In past tense, you might say, “He went to the store,” or to indicate prior time “Earlier, he had gone to the store.” In present you’d likewise use “He goes to the store” and “He went to the store.” The normal past tense takes over for the past perfect, and it’s a much cleaner tense.

The first mini-scene of TDD is as follows:

As services drew to an end, Sarah peered around the curtain separating the men from the women. Mama shot her a look, but she had to be sure she could reach the door without Papa seeing her. After what he’d done, she couldn’t face him right now. There he was, head bobbing in the sea of skullcaps and beards. She’d be long gone before he extracted himself.

“Mama,” she whispered, “can you handle supper if I go to Anne’s?” Probably last night’s dinner debacle had been Mama’s idea, but they’d never seen eye to eye on the subject. Papa, on the other hand, was supposed to be on her side.

Mama’s shoulders stiffened, but she nodded.

The end of the afternoon service signaled Sarah’s chance. She squeezed her mother’s hand, gathered her heavy skirts, and fled.

As an experiment, I rewrote this in present tense, a fairly straightforward change:

As services draw to an end, Sarah peers around the curtain separating the men from the women. Mama shoots her a look, but she has to be sure she can reach the door without Papa seeing her. After what he did, she can’t face him right now. There he is, head bobbing in the sea of skullcaps and beards. She’ll be long gone before he extracts himself.

“Mama,” she whispers, “can you handle supper if I go to Anne’s?” Probably last night’s dinner debacle was Mama’s idea, but they never saw eye to eye on the subject. Papa, on the other hand, is supposed to be on her side.

Mama’s shoulders stiffen, but she nods.

The end of the afternoon service signals Sarah’s chance. She squeezes her mother’s hand, gathers her heavy skirts, and flees.

Which do you guys like? I suspect that past tense is more appropriate to this story, being conventional and also given the setting in 1913. But I’ve grown so fond of the present tense that I can’t judge anymore.

For more posts on writing, click here.

Related posts:

  1. Untimed – Two Novels, Two Drafts!
By: agavin
Comments (3)
Posted in: Darkening Dream, Untimed
Tagged as: Andy Gavin, Creative Writing, Fiction, Past tense, Present tense, Simple past (English), The Darkening Dream, Untimed, Voice

All Things Change

Oct05

So I’m about halfway through my last polish pass on my third major draft of Untimed. [Update 7:44pm, finished the polish] This is one of the umpteen revision passes. Only another day or two to go before I send it off again and get down to waiting for feedback (hands down my least favorite part of writing).

The book totally kicks ass BTW — biased opinion but true.

Anyway, this has me planning to spend my “downtime” (waiting) doing some really serious research on self-publishing my first novel, The Darkening Dream, and seeing if I can get it out there before the holiday season.

I’ve been following self-publishing blogs like A Newbie’s Guide to Publishing and Dean Wesley Smith for around a year. These guys — rhetoric aside — have made sense for some time but the arguments for traditional publishing grow lamer and lamer. Check out something like this, which lays it out there — albeit with a lot of flavor. Publishing is in the throws of the cataclysmic “doing digital” change that has or is shaking up all the media businesses. For example, in music the conversion from media (vinyl, cassette, CD) to MP3 during which the labels/studios stuck their head in the sand and found themselves nearly destroyed.

The fact is, the change is coming no matter what any big old-school companies want or try to do. Readers are well on their way to embracing ebooks, the rise of the tablet (aka iPad), and dropping smartphone and reader prices (order your Kindle Fire here! 250,000 preorders in 5 days!), has etched the writing on the wall (in blood). In a few short years print will make up 20 or less percent of the market. Paper books (and I say this as someone who has a two story library with over 15,000 of them!) aren’t going to vanish instantly, but they won’t be majorly relevant for novel sales.

So this basically guarantees completely and without any doubt that print revenues will crater, leaving publishers unable to support their big overheads. Borders (and nearly every independent) going bankrupt will just hasten this. Barnes and Noble is next. They tried with the Nook, but Amazon is going to crush them (again, Kindle fire, not to mention $79 regular Kindle). And publishers, being large old-school companies that employ LOTS of people under the old model are showing lots of signs of panic, but pretty much not a glimmer of adapting to the changing business.

But they won’t have one soon. Because without control of the gates to bookstores, they don’t control anything.

Right now they still make the better product. But as an author they:

1. tie up rights

2. take way too much money (15% vs 70% doing it yourself)

3. take way too long (15 months instead of like 1-2 to market!)

4. charge too much for ebooks

5. don’t actually do any marketing

6. often have really stupid ideas about “marketability” (like “sex doesn’t sell” or “vampires are over” *)

Eventually new meaner leaner packaging companies will make the murky ground of processing books a bit easier, but in the meantime. Time to get researching.

If anyone knows a kick ass indie book marketer, I’m looking to hire one (that’s the only part I can’t really do myself).

For more posts on writing, click here.

* From above: The Vampire Dairies and True Blood both prove both statements simultaneously asinine. And while TDD does have a vampire, he does not ever sparkle in daylight (900 years and he hasn’t seen a glimpse of it) and he is not in the least sexy. He is, however, frightfully smart, cautious, and happy to decorate your house with the entrails of your closest family members.

Related posts:

  1. The Darkening Dream
By: agavin
Comments (3)
Posted in: Books, Darkening Dream
Tagged as: Amazon, Amazon Kindle, Andy Gavin, Arts, E-book, IPad, Kindle, Kindle Fire, Nook, Publishing, Self-publishing, The Darkening Dream, Untimed, Writing, Writing & Editing

Weekend Draft

Sep23

I just finished the rough cut of the third major draft of my new novel, Untimed. Just in time too to get out of town.

This weekend will be quiet and post free. I’m off to Vegas with the Foodie Club for some more high end gluttony. Namely Twist by Pierre Gagnaire and  É by José Andrés (my review of the comparable Saam here).  You can expect detailed coverage when I get back.

For more on the revision process, see this recent post.

Or for more posts on writing, click here.

Related posts:

  1. On Writing: Yet Another Draft
By: agavin
Comments (1)
Posted in: Food, Untimed
Tagged as: Fiction, Food, José Andrés, Las Vegas, Novel, Pierre Gagnaire, Untimed, Vegas

Revision Slog – Novel as Algorithm

Sep22

As I slog toward the end of my third major draft of my new novel, Untimed, I felt the need for brief procrastination in the form of detailing the process. Most people seem to discount how much grind and sheer time investment is required in writing (and revising) a novel, even a vey steady workaholic like me. Let’s do a little breakdown.

Untimed is actually fairly short, currently at 83,000 words and 38 chapters. This is MUCH shorter than my first book started out. Length is a factor because you have to iterate (i.e. read through the book a LOT of times).

Think of each major draft as a loop (I am a programmer) with various sub loops.

. Generate Idea (for the most part this kind of happens or doesn’t)

. Character Design and High Level Plotting (you could spend who knows how long on this, I don’t find it that useful upfront, most of it just comes to me while doing other things)

. The First Draft:

. Initial drafting: For each chapter (1..38) loop:

. Plot the beats in the chapter. This takes an absolute minimum of 1-3 hours even if you know exactly what’s supposed to be in there. Sometimes it takes several days of banging your head and talking to others.

. Pound out a first draft. I can do 2000-2500 words of new draft in one 8 hour day. I generally make this a chapter. Occasionally I’ll be on a roll and do two.

. Reread it to catch really stupid typos, phrasing, and make sure it makes sense (1 hour)

. Subtotal. For above book that represents 50-60 workdays (NOTE: if you take days off, it’s chronologically much longer). Notes on finishing the first draft, here.

. High level pass:

. It’s impossible when writing a chapter or two a day to see the big picture in the book, so you have to do at least one faster pass through afterward.

. I can do about 10-15,000 words a day like this, which is actually fairly brutal

. Subtotal. About 7 workdays. 1-2 full reads.

. Quick read:

. If you want to judge pacing you have to read it all in a day or two like a normal book, not on the computer

. Subtotal. 1-2 days. 1 full read.

. Draft total. About 60-70 workdays. 4-5 full reads.

. Wait for feedback:

. Since you have to finish something and send it to someone, even a paid editor will take some time to read it and return feedback. This usually takes several weeks. I try and overlap it with the cleanup passes, but it’s tricky.

. Revision Drafts (I’m currently finishing the third major redraft) so I’ve done two of these so far on Untimed:

. Plan, outline, and organize changes.

. Can take from a couple days to a couple weeks. Some thoughts on this with Untimed HERE.

. I can do about 2-3 chapters a full day of revision. So for each block of 2-3 chapters loop:

. Do the actual revision. This can be fairly grueling, involving initial big surgery, a smoothing pass, then a cleanup pass

. Reread it to catch really stupid typos, phrasing, and make sure it makes sense (2 hours)

. Subtotal. Plotting 7 days, revising 15 workdays. Generates 2-3  extra reads per chapter.

. Medium Quick read:

. Checking for consistency

. Subtotal. 3-4 days. 1 full read.

. Total for each revision draft. Approximately 25 workdays. 3-4 full reads. Notes on the second draft HERE.

. Wait for feekback. You have to find out from others, often people who have never read the book before, how a draft comes across. This takes awhile. A reader who gets back to you in a week is amazing. It often takes several and some gentle (or not so gentle) prodding. Or tossing them some money. Sometimes that doesn’t even work. I had one (paid) unemployed beta reader tell me that they couldn’t start it because it interfered with their watching TV! NOTE: Said individual did not get paid.

. Line Editing:

. When the big picture is all settled out one sends it out to an editor for Line Editing. This involves more editor time than author time, but still chunks of the book come back and one must go over the edits and install them.

. My editor will request a “compression” pass before sending it to her. This is an extra pass to try and self edit it first.

. I can do about 8000 words a day like this. Approximately 10 days. 1 read. This is brutal but can be overlapped chronologically with the editor’s line editing. I.e. I can self edit a chunk and then send it out, meanwhile self editing the next chunk while the editor is working on the previous one, then also fit in the next part (processing) of returning chunks in a pipelined fashion.

. I can “process” returned line editing at about 6,000-8,000 words a day. For each chunk loop:

. Read over the track changes version of the line edit in word, approving and rejecting various edits and making cleanups

. Copy over each scene in into the real draft. Cleanup formatting.

. Do a quick read of the chunk or chapters to make sure nothing got screwed up

. Subtotal. Approximately 12 workdays, but spread across more chronological time as the edits can’t churn out this much per day. 2-3 full reads.

. Quick read:

. If you want to judge pacing you have to read it all in a day or two like a normal book, not on the computer

. Subtotal. 1-2 days. 1 full read.

. Total for line editing. approximately 24 days. 4-5 full reads.

As you can see. This adds up to a LOT of days and a lot of passes. Finishing up the third draft here, I’m already on eight months and at least 12 read throughs, and I can look forward to several more of each.

For more posts on writing, click here.

Related posts:

  1. On Writing: Yet Another Draft
  2. Untimed – Two Novels, Two Drafts!
  3. Untimed – Two Novels, Check!
  4. Done Again, Hopefully
  5. Middle Madness
By: agavin
Comments (5)
Posted in: Untimed
Tagged as: Andy Gavin, Beta reader, Creative Writing, drafts, edit, Fiction writing, Novel Writing, novels, Proofreading, Revision (writing), Untimed, Writing, Writing & Editing

Middle Madness

Sep08

I think I’m over the hump with the third major draft of my new novel, Untimed (for a quick blurb see here).

Story structure is hard. And while this book is much better structured than early drafts of my previous novel, it had two major problems: the ending and the first part of Act II. Late (very late) in the second draft I cracked the ending. So that just left the middle.

Therefore, I wasn’t surprised when the biggest comment from my awesome freelance editors’ (I use three: Renni Browne, Shannon Roberts, and R.J. Cavender) involved problems in this middle section. It’s not that the scenes wen’t good or exciting, but mostly that I fell prey to a personal need to sneak Napoleon into the story (time travel seems to call out for the most pivotal personality of the modern era) and this resulted in a bad case of “Double Mumbo Jumbo” (or a variant thereof).

So what is the dreaded Double Mumbo Jumbo? Most specifically it’s the phase coined in Blake Snyder‘s Save the Cat book (which I discuss here). DMJ is invoked by throwing two unrelated implausible things into the same story. However, my specific problem is really a cousin, what my editor Renni calls “1+1=1/2”. This is, the idea that doing the same improbable thing twice in the same book isn’t twice as good as doing it once, but actually half as good. Even if the thing is cool. So a kind of DMJ.

And I was doing it in my middle.

Still, this section of my story accomplished a lot of other things too. And I had to figure out how to rework it to keep as much of the good as I could, avoid a DMJ — and not make TOO much work for myself in terms of repercussions later in the book. Thinking about various ways to restructure, particularly given the constraints of my story, my elaborate time travel scheme, and history itself, was quite the brain buster. I thought on it all day for at least a week. So hard one Friday that I literally gave myself a migraine headache! I found myself pondering time travel so aggressively that I became confused as to what year it was — and then my vision began to shimmer (migraine).

I probably outlined 15 different scenarios and talked about countless more. This part of the writing process is very peculiar. I often end up with a half-baked scenario that satisfies some goals, but just doesn’t really work. One quickly reaches a point where no new ideas surface internally and you need to shake it up. I then find it extremely useful to talk with a limited pool of friends who have read the book in it’s latest incarnation. This allows me to efficiently go over the possible elements. Then we talk out the problems. By vetting numerous failed scenarios it’s often possible to collect enough different disconnected ideas that a single coherent new plot can be jig-sawed together. Or at least coherent enough to polish out in the writing.

This last week, I even twice resorted to writing out (as prose) incomplete outlines to see if they worked. The first revealed itself as a miserable failure. The second made it to the finish.

Now it’s off to friends and editors to see how it passes muster.

For more posts on writing, click here.

Related posts:

  1. Untimed – Two Novels, Two Drafts!
  2. Untimed – Two Novels, Check!
  3. Beginnings and Endings
  4. Peace in the Middle East? – Mezze
  5. Margarita Madness – The Mix
By: agavin
Comments (1)
Posted in: Untimed
Tagged as: Andy Gavin, Blake Snyder, books, Creative Writing, Fiction, Headache, Migraine, Napoleon, Napoleon I, Novel in Progress, Novel Writing, novels, Structure, Time travel, Untimed

Introducing the Writing Index

Aug20

In my continued effort to improve site navigation I’ve introduced a new page to index all my writing posts, sorted by topic. You can also find it in the “Writing” menu at the top of the site or by clicking on the gold “Writing” icon on the righthand sidebar.

As an added bonus, the page includes a blurb of my new novel, Untimed, check it out.

Related posts:

  1. Introducing the Fiction Index
  2. Topics at a Glance
  3. On Writing: Yet Another Draft
  4. On Writing: Revising, and Waiting
  5. Scrivener – Writing the old way is crazy
By: agavin
Comments (0)
Posted in: Writing
Tagged as: Book Writing, Creative Writing, Novel, Untimed, Writer, Writing

Untimed – Two Novels, Two Drafts!

Aug02

My second novel, Untimed, is a YA time-travel adventure.

And I just finished the rough version of my second draft. Whew! Happy to be done with that. The book grew to 84,000 words (it’ll probably get trimmed down a bit for draft three). It still needs polish, but the second draft is often the worst, and this one took 5 or so weeks of concentrated work. While I learned from my first novel and put the beginning at the right place, the previous draft still had a number of classic first draft problems.

Namely, character and motivation needed work. Plot can formally be considered the friction between the protagonist’s desire and the obstacles to said desire. The book is/was jam packed with conflict and action, but the desire line was a bit weak. I won’t say it’s perfect now, but it’s a hell of a lot better. As are the characters. For me it’s difficult in the first draft to flesh both of these out because as a pantser I don’t know exactly where I’m going with the story until I get there. Not that I write blind, but I like the story and the characters to take me where they want.

When writing the second draft, you have an end (even if you plan on changing it), so you know all the elements that you intend to put in the book. Therefore it’s easier to go back and foreshadow those and reinforce the important ones. You also know what the character is going to need to feel at different points in the story, so it’s easier to try and set up and reinforce those feelings.

Additionally, as a pantser, I actually get to know my characters in the first draft. The writing of them brings them to life in my head. Then in the second draft, I need to brainstorm extra elements in their past and present that reinforce the traits I know they’re supposed to have, then hint at the them in the book. Again, hard to do the first time around.

Now to see what some reader that aren’t me think — and trial and nail the third draft.

I’d also like to thank my story-consultants Sharon & Bryan for listening to every blow by blow change and my independent editors Renni & Shannon for pointing me in the second draft direction. Here’s to hoping I went far enough :-).

The second draft involved a few weeks of incubation (June), a full read and polish (also June), and then hardcore writing from June 30 until August 2.

And in case you’re wondering what the book is about, I still haven’t written a log line, but its a lean-mean-fast-paced first person present story about a boy whose name no one remembers — not even his mother. And it features Ben Franklin, Napoleon, a male gang leader that wears red high heels, and the Tick-Tocks, creepy clockwork time traveling machines from the future.

For more posts on writing, click here.

Related posts:

  1. Untimed – Two Novels, Check!
  2. Untimed – The Second Cover
  3. Beginnings and Endings
  4. On Writing: Yet Another Draft
  5. The Darkening Dream
By: agavin
Comments (7)
Posted in: Untimed
Tagged as: Andrew Gavin, Andy Gavin, books, Creative Writing, Fiction, Novel, Protagonist, Revising, Science Fiction, Time travel, Untimed, Writing
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